REN V-cense cream review

V-cense
E: What on earth were you up to the other night, M? I saw tweets about Frankincense and frankincensely, I’m puzzled.

M: I went to a bloggers’ event about REN’s anti-ageing skincare. Average bloggers’ age: 23.

E: Huh. Why do they need anti-ageing? Or perhaps they are actually 43 and IT WORKS?

M: Could be. Katie, their marketing lady, looked about 17, and she’s been working there for seven years. She’s either a prodigy, or a black sorceress. Or it’s the V-Cense cream, with “Frankincense and Boswellic acid to relax facial muscles”. You’ve used that, haven’t you?

E: I’m using it now. I like it.

M: Oh? The smell bothers me. I’m scared to put it on my skin because I don’t want to smell like Baby Jesus.

E: I like the smell, it’s pine fresh, like facial Cif. My current attitude to skin care is very simple, M. I like it if it doesn’t give me hideous break outs and does the job. This V-Cense (caution: space lizards at work) does that.

M: You’ve been eating live mice, haven’t you. You don’t care about the free radicals. Or the fact Vitamin C is a “big story”.

E: I don’t. This stuff is fine. It doesn’t give me angry monkey face and that’s my gold standard in skin care, right now.

M: Well that’s a ringing endorsement.

E: It is! And we have a pot of this frankincense infused goop to give away so that one of your faces can not look like an angry monkey too!

M: All you have to do is answer this question in the comments before 14 February 2014 (ooooh!): What does the V in V-Cense stand for? Silly answers only, please.

REN V-cense Youth Vitality Cream (£28) and Revitalising Night Cream (£32)

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M likes bright powders in tiny pots and anything that will make her hair more Jen Brill and less Shaun the Sheep.

29 Comments

  • February 3, 2014

    Jo

    V stands for Valentine!

  • February 3, 2014

    Nita

    I’m going to take a stab in the dark here and say “Vitamin!”
    ..???xxx

  • February 3, 2014

    Claire

    Velociraptor. Duh.

  • February 3, 2014

    Alex S

    Velour! Silky smooth velour.

  • February 3, 2014

    Hayley M

    It’s not a letter – it’s a roman numeral offering a screen to anything more than the standard 5 senses (or censes obv) in addition to a less haggy face. If you use this and Bruce Willis dies you will not be troubled by his wife bothering ghost.

  • February 3, 2014

    Sarah

    “V” stands for “vitriol”. Put it on your face, keep it out of your heart and BAM eternal youth. It’s all very evil stepmother in Snow White. This product doesn’t have a pig’s heart in it, right?

  • February 3, 2014

    Lindsay

    Veritas- Latin for truth. Is it a secret truth serum?! ah burn the witch!!

  • February 3, 2014

    mooncalf

    vipectus – just like the v in ctrl+v

  • February 3, 2014

    Holly

    Virtually-(makes)cense to use Frankincense on your face.

  • February 3, 2014

    Alison Cross

    Vagina. I actually was going to type Virgins but my ipad was way ahead of me, so I’m sticking with it. There’s a terrible joke there about vaginas and sticking, but I’m ignoring it.

    I need this cream. I’m 50 and look like I’m smuggling things into the country in my eyebags.

    AX

  • February 3, 2014

    Emma

    V stands for Vitamin C! V-cense is Vitamin C/Frankincense, am I right?!

  • February 3, 2014

    LinB

    Or “vanity.” It could stand for “vanity.” Better that than “vehicular homicide.” Which, technically, would be VH, so … never mind.

  • February 3, 2014

    Chloe

    Very.
    It’s so very to have stuff that makes you peachy like Veronica/Winona

  • February 3, 2014

    becky

    Vixen! Cos of vixen-ness being desirable n’all.

  • February 3, 2014

    Jocelyn-Jane

    Tis surely V for Vampyre

    Perfect, flawless skin FOREVER ;) *

    * see also: avoiding sun damage

  • February 3, 2014

    Raloo

    Vajazzle, obvs

  • February 4, 2014

    Emma

    Vulcan. Has to be vulcan. Never saw Spock with a flakey crusty eyebaggy face did you? Ahh. See, I told you.
    Now to use my vulcan mind meld powers to win the prize! Hnnnnnnnnhhhhh. Uff.

  • February 4, 2014

    soleils

    Vat-a-lot-of-non-Cense

    (hmmm, OK, I apologise) (I DO want it)

  • February 4, 2014

    Lou

    Surely it stands for voodoo…space lizard voodoo?!

  • February 4, 2014

    kath

    Has to be vulpine. For its foxy bestowing properties.

  • February 7, 2014

    @KeyserSuze

    It doesn’t stand for anything, like the ‘v’ in Pantene pro-v. Or it stands for vavavoom.

  • February 10, 2014

    hh

    clearly it’s “vuvuzela,” the stately instrument the three kings played as they marched solemnly towards the Christ-child with their offerings of anti-ageing frankincense creams etc.

  • […] on Facegoop this week: win a REN anti-ageing night cream (pro tip: do NOT give this as a Valentine’s gift) by thinking of words beginning with […]

  • February 12, 2014

    Claire

    Vulva! (Is that *too* rude?) :-D

  • […] on Facegoop this week: win a REN anti-ageing night cream (pro tip: do NOT give this as a Valentine’s gift) by thinking of words beginning with […]

  • […] on Facegoop this week: win a REN anti-ageing night cream (pro tip: do NOT give this as a Valentine’s gift) by thinking of words beginning with […]

  • February 13, 2014

    Jan

    Vanishing–this goop sounds just like grandma’s old fashioned vanishing cream, and if you use it long enough the anti-aging space rays will cause you to disappear.

  • February 14, 2014

    E

    This is E speaking and my login isn’t working but the winner of the AMAZING V CENSE GIVEAWAY is ….

    ……

    …..

    ORATA!

    With the bewitching “vuvuzela”. Well done, sheep! Send us your postal details and your very own phial of precious Vuvuzela-Cense will be winging its way to you.

  • February 16, 2014

    judith

    I know it’s too late but I would have loved this to be V for Venereal!

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